Sienna Miller took love cheat Jude Law back only after he agreed to six ‘commandments’ about his future behaviour, it was revealed yesterday.The actress’s list of stringent conditions include the movie star staying faithful, controlling his temper and not asking her to marry him.

Miss Miller has also made Law list every person he has ever slept with.

She was furious when it was reported at the weekend that he once had a three-in-a-bed session with his ex-wife Sadie Frost and Kate Moss - because the model was not on his list. But he has denied he slept with her. […]

“Sienna believes in monogamy and will not stand for him cheating. And she has told him that he has to control his temper as he often used to shout at her and she will not take it any more.”

However, observers are already speculating that the agreement will never work. “Everyone is joking that she has written her commandments down on a scroll,’ said the source.

“But really Jude will never be able to fulfil these conditions, as they mean him totally changing his character.

What character? Did I miss something?

BRAD Pitt (above) fired a pregnant employee from his production company because she dared speak out on behalf of his estranged wife, Jennifer Aniston. Pitt, 41, was furious that Aniston’s pal Kristin Hahn - an exec with Plan B (the film company he and Aniston, 36, founded in 2002) � told Vanity Fair it would be “beyond painful” for the actress to see Pitt and girlfriend Angelina Jolie, 30, have a baby together. An Us Weekly source claims Pitt “screamed” at Hahn, claiming she violated her contract by speaking about him without his approval - although Aniston had given hers. Hahn claims the departure was “amicable.”

Pissing off your boss is always a bad career move. Or so I’ve heard.

SIR PAUL McCARTNEY can’t stand the music of MADONNA and ROBBIE WILLIAMS, despite respecting the artists as nice people.The former BEATLE shared the stage with the MATERIAL GIRL and ex-TAKE THAT hunk at the London Live 8 earlier this year (02JUL05).

After Williams’ song ANGELS was named Best Song of the past 25 years at February’s (05) Brit Awards, McCartney says, “I wasn’t that convinced by Angels winning the best song of the last 25 years.

“I think for an ex-boy group person, he’s done well. He makes pretty good records for his audience. But I’m not a Robbie fan.”

Despite admitting he has met Madonna several times, McCartney’s is far from enamoured with her music, saying, “I’ve met her and she’s a pretty cool person, but her records have never really turned me on.”

Didn’t turn him on?? Geez, what the heck is he doing while listening to music??

Fashion guru Valentino Garavani has launched a scathing attack on socialite Paris Hilton, labeling the hotel heiress “vulgar” and “not even pretty.”The Italian fashion designer “shuddered” when New Yorker magazine reporter Michael Specter suggested Hilton may wear a Valentino dress for her forthcoming marriage to Greek shipping heir Paris Latsis.

Valentino, 72, scathes, “No, I don’t like her. She is marrying the son of a friend of mine. They have billions.

“She is vulgar, and she is not even pretty.

“The Hiltons, they have nothing.”

I think they have lots of unresolved issues. Well, and ugly, vulgar daughters…

You really don’t need much else beyond that.

Actress Portia De Rossi used to take advantage of her drunk teenage friends by persuading them that going to bed with her was just innocent fun.The unnamed pals never suspected gay De Rossi — then just plain old Amanda Rogers — harbored lesbian desires, so they felt sure the bedroom sessions were totally harmless.

The former Ally McBeal star, who is now dating comedienne Ellen DeGeneres, tells gay magazine The Advocate, “In high school I had sex with girls quite a few times. They were straight women who I convinced to jump in the sack with me.

“I did a lot of fast talking as a youth; I was pretty good at it too. I was never talked into it (going to bed) — I was always the one doing the talking.

“I just thought, ‘This is so great and so interesting, and if only you knew how interesting this is and how great it feels …’

“But these weren’t real relationships with women who were gay, these were with women who were drunk. They thought, ‘She’s not a lesbian, so I can jump in the sack with her.’”

This is just so wrong. And, yet, so very, very hot…

Well, sorta:

Elijah Wood is continually stunned by clever cyber pranksters who try to prove he is gay.The ‘Lord of the rings’ star is often caught out by websites with far from subtle names, like www.veryverygay.com, when he’s surfing the Internet, but he’s rarely offended.

And, unlike many stars, he isn’t planning any legal action to stop the pranksters - he simply marvels at their creativity.

He says: “There’s one that’s called elijahwoodisveryverygay, which is actually a personal favourite of mine, it’s absolutely hilarious.

“It’s this kind of joke website that maintains that they have proof that I am very very gay in various photographs - photographic evidence (of me) holding hands with a male.” […]

“I was actually at a film festival once… and this fan came up with a gift… I open the gift in front of all these people that I’m talking to and it happens to be a photo from one of these websites of me and DOMINIC MONAGHAN making sweet love. If you didn’t know any better, it kinda looks real.

He’s right. They do look real and they are pretty funny.

DEFIANT Russell Crowe is threatening to quit Hollywood over his phone rage court case.And the Gladiator star, whose trial for assault was adjourned yesterday until November, has vowed not to curb his explosive temper.

If he is convicted for throwing a phone at a New York hotel worker he faces up to seven years in jail and could be barred from working in the US. Even if he is found guilty of a less serious offence, he will face visa problems. But Crowe, 41, said: “Maybe it’s better I don’t travel to America. Maybe it’s better I don’t work in the area of the business that attracts so many flies.

“You tell me to p*** off too many times and I probably will. I don’t mind shrinking my professional life.” […]

He said: “They all want me to be examined by psychologists. I come from a different culture. If I’ve got something on my mind, you’ll hear about it. Voila, mental anguish solved.”

Okay, forgive me if I’m a little slow, but where exactly does the whole “hurling-phones-at-people” fit in? Is it before he speaks his mind or after?

*ducks for cover*

Bridget Jones is untying the knot. Renee Zellweger, who played the lovelorn Brit in “Bridget Jones’s Diary,” and country music star Kenny Chesney will have their four-month-old marriage annulled, Chesney’s publicist, Holly Gleason, and Zellweger’s Los Angeles-based publicist Nanci Ryder, confirmed to The Associated Press on Thursday.In court papers filed Wednesday, Zellweger listed “fraud” as the reason for the breakup but did not elaborate.

A phone call to her attorney was not immediately returned, nor was a call to Gleason later in the day regarding the fraud claim.

I think someone spent their honeymoon digging in the closet… and got lucky.

Unfortunately, she didn’t have a whole lot to say, you know, being coked out of her head and all:

KATE Moss let fly with a tirade of foul-mouthed abuse yesterday when confronted about her snorting fat lines of cocaine.

Asked about our exclusive video clips of her hoovering up the Class A drug, she said: “A video? What video? F*** off, I don’t want to know.”

Questioned if she wanted to talk about taking drugs, the 31-year-old supermodel then raged: “F*** off, f*** off, f*** off, f*** off! Just f*** off!” […]

As the beauty threw a hissy-fit, crackhead Doherty tried to calm her down. Pulling her away as the couple ran towards the Mercer Hotel where they were staying, he urged: “Come on, we’ll read it tomorrow anyway… deal with it then.”

Then he squared up to our reporter, but Kate pulled him away, saying “f***ing leave it”.

Even inside the hotel, away from the chaos outside, Moss refused to listen to our questions. We wanted her to respond to the drug claims sensibly. Instead, she lost it again, ran into the lobby area screaming at the top of her voice.

Someone please remind me not to stay at the Mercer.

Paul McCartney’s wife Heather Mills McCartney lost her prosthetic leg during a violent confrontation with security guards at Jennifer Lopez’s New York office.The incident happened on Tuesday as the model turned animal rights activist attempted to deliver a People For The Ethical Treatment Of Animals (PETA) DVD showing creatures being killed for fur to Lopez, following a demonstration at which the 37-year-old pleaded with fans to boycott the superstar’s music, movies and clothes because she uses fur in her fashion range, Sweetface.

After striding into the building opposite Manhattan’s Bryant Park, accompanied by an entourage of journalists and photographers, McCartney Mills - who lost a leg after being hit by a car in 1993 - was confronted by burley minders who yelled: “You have no authority to be here. […]

In the tussle that ensued, Mills McCartney’s prosthetic leg became detached. She bent down and clutched her knee in pain, before asking to use a bathroom so she could reattach the leg.

Guards refused and she was forced to cling onto a photographer as she carried out the humiliating task on a stairwell.

Talk about adding insult to injury…