Paris Hilton got a surprise at Macy’s last Friday when a mustachioed man turned up in the long line of women who’d bought an $80 bottle of her new fragrance. The hotel heiress asked the dude how she should autograph her photo.”Make it out to ‘The Guy Who Has My Storage Locker Stuff,’” said David Hans Schmidt, who then introduced himself as the broker of the secret diaries, videotapes and snapshots that went on the auction block when she didn’t pay her storage bill. “That stuff can’t be published,” the wide-eyed Hilton told Schmidt.

“Like your sex video?” said Schmidt, who has offered to sell Hilton’s possessions back to her. (Just to jog her memory about the Hilton family heirlooms, he showed her a photo of herself as a little girl holding baby sister Nicky.) Hilton told Schmidt she’d meet with him in L.A. She also signed his picture: “To David, Love Paris Hilton xoxo.”

That’s what happens when you don’t pay your storage rental fee. Cheapskate.

[Via: Yeeeah!]

This girl’s under pressure and I mean that literally:

Kate Beckinsale has revealed she could squirt milk out of breasts and across the room after giving birth.

The ‘Underworld: Evolution’ star says she developed the unusual skill while breastfeeding daughter Lily, her child from her relationship with actor Michael Sheen.

Beckinsale - who is now married to film director Len Wiseman - told US chat show host Jay Leno: “I do miss breastfeeding. I was good at it. I got more than my fair share - I could hit the wall from quite a distance! I do have some useless talents.”

Do tell, sweety. Do tell!

[Via: DListed]

Judging by the mortified look on her face, Eva Longoria seems to have had a dolphin “run in” in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico, recently.

They really are horny bastards, aren’t they?

[Image: People]

I like how this guy’s mind works. I give him a quick shoutout and he comes back with this awesome picture proving for once and for all that the Davis’s really are a bunch of rich trolls in disguise.

Don’t be afraid, just click the picture to remove the makeup and see what ugly truth is lurking underneath. Brilliant shit!

So the big guys over at the Phfoker bunker have just notified me that they’ve managed to recruit another victim into their devious circle of doom:

Moe Slitz is an uncompromising blog that deals with all the stuff that really matters. What’s that, you ask? D’uh! Babes, booze and the creative wisdom on how to efficiently combine the two, of course.

What can I say, Moe Slitz is all about having a good time. Welcome to the party, pal.

I like parties. This sounds promising.

THE Davis dynasty of Beverly Hills is urging oily heir Brandon to enter a drug and alcohol rehab facility - but so far Brandon has resisted their pleas. […]

But while the unemployed Brandon is balking at entering a rehab facility because he thinks he doesn’t have a drug or alcohol problem, his family wants him to go for public-relations reasons.

Ever since the video surfaced, the Davis family has been shunned by young Hollywood, and matriarch Barbara Davis is even having problems getting A-listers to participate in her annual Carousel Ball in October.

I don’t think it’s the bad PR. A-listers hate to be surrounded by ugly and Brandon’s mom is some seriously ugly lady. I mean come on, I can’t be the only one who craves a “Yo Momma” joke when looking at that plastic surgery troll in a dress.

It’s like some unwritten law of nature or something - some parties rock and some, well, blow chunks. Ain’t that right Linds?

Lindsay Lohan was eating at the Spotted Pig gastropub in New York recently. She and her friends had commandeered the private room. When the group left, staff found that someone had vomited all over the room. Cue a frantic rush to clean up ready for the next reservation. And so poor Chelsea Clinton and friends sat down to dinner, with the room still stinking of bleach and ammonia.

That’s sick. I think I’m gonna hurl.

[Source: popbitch]

If the rumors are to be believed, Mandy Moore dumped Zach Braff:

“There was no drama,” says the source. “They were ready.” “One big factor: their nine-year age gap. “Mandy was very young when they got together and she wanted to see what’s out there, now that she’s a woman,” says the source. “Zach was mature and realized it was time to let her do that.”

Or maybe she’s just looking for another 8+ inch pole. I don’t know. I’m just saying.

Good times. Matt Damon and his wife Luciana Bozan are proud new parents of a little baby girl:

Matt Damon and his wife, Luciana, have welcomed a baby girl named Isabella, PEOPLE has learned exclusively.

“The baby is here. Isabella arrived yesterday,” Damon’s brother Kyle told PEOPLE on Monday. Isabella was born Sunday night in Miami.

“Mother and Isabella are doing fine,” Damon’s rep Jennifer Allen, confirmed to PEOPLE. “The family is very happy and everyone’s healthy.”

This is the first child for the couple. Luciana also has a daughter, Alexia, from a previous marriage.

Cute shit. The Hollywood Baby Boom shows no sign of fatigue.

So here is what I learned from the new Britney Spears interview: Girl’s still an airhead.

Despite the tabloids reports of trouble on the home front, Spears shares with Lauer that her marriage with Kevin Federline is “awesome,” (Jaime: Sure, that makes sense. He’s an “awesome” guy.) and that the reports of Kevin living in the basement are false. Read the rest of this entry »