UPDATE: We have been notified by Jude Law’s lawyers that our popbitch-referenced sex party story is full of shit. The absence of a nanny theme should’ve ticked us off. Alas, it did not. I guess that’s why they say hindsight is 40/40.

We act for Jude Law. We have written to Popbitch and informed them that this story is completely untrue and highly defamatory of our client. They have confirmed that they are in the process of withdrawing it from their site. Kindly inform us that you will do the same immediately.

Well, what can I say, when a guy doesn’t want to get his freak on, he just doesn’t want to get his freak on. That’s cool. We don’t judge.

It’s like some unwritten law of nature or something - some parties rock and some, well, blow chunks. Ain’t that right Linds?

Lindsay Lohan was eating at the Spotted Pig gastropub in New York recently. She and her friends had commandeered the private room. When the group left, staff found that someone had vomited all over the room. Cue a frantic rush to clean up ready for the next reservation. And so poor Chelsea Clinton and friends sat down to dinner, with the room still stinking of bleach and ammonia.

That’s sick. I think I’m gonna hurl.

[Source: popbitch]

If you said naked Germans in black leather, you’re spending way too much time reading gossip rags:

A visit to a nightclub in Berlin was a party too far for the wild-child American Pie star [Tara Reid].

She was so shocked by the hard-core goings-on she locked herself in her hotel room - and took the first flight out the next day. […]

“She arrived on Friday and was supposed to spend the weekend touring the hot spots but she was so shocked at the first stop in the KitKatClub on Saturday that she fled.” Tara, 26, flew to London on Sunday morning - three days early.

A KitKatClub spokesman confirmed that guests get to fulfil their fantasies and said the sight of black leather and a lot of naked flesh had been too much for the star.

He continued: “Tara threw her complimentary glass of champagne across the club in disgust and fled back to her suite at the Palace Hotel before flying back to London.”

Henrik Tedefjaerd from the Berlin Agenten agency that arranged the programme said: “She is obviously not as tough as the image she likes to portray.”

Yeah sure, that must be it.

That’s the good news.

The bad news is the escort escorted her out of the VIP room:

RACHEL Hunter was escorted out of a VIP room at the Oakley/Blender X-Games party at the Key Club in Hollywood the other night after she was caught eating the spicy chicken wings set aside for rap duo the Ying Yang Twins, the night’s special performers. Club staffers who went backstage to check that the group’s catering demands had been met found Rod Stewart’s sexy ex and four girlfriends helping themselves to the Twins’ wings and booze. After an indignant Hunter and her posse were shooed away, the club placed an emergency order for more “spicy chicken wings” before the rappers finished their set.

I love the faint irony that they “shooed away” the pigeons to save the spicy chicken.

Kate Beckinsale sure knows how to throw a fun birthday party:

It’s no secret that the British actress is one of the ladies in the running for the Wonder Woman lead role. She’s already someone who makes her friends wonder how she can surprise them next. Beckinsale turned thirty-two on Tuesday. Instead of blowing her cash on a fancy event in a swank restaurant, the fun-loving lady treated her friends and family members to a party at the World on Wheels roller disco in Los Angeles. Her husband, director Len Wiseman, the co-star of her new flick (Click), Adam Sandler, and guests were treated to a meal of burgers and assorted treats from a local In-N-Out fast food location. It’s nice to see that the fame and money hasn’t been wasted on Beckinsale. She still knows how to have a good time without spending millions and getting everybody in the joint drunk.

Another fellow In-N-Out lover who can do the roller skate boogie.

Who’s the nerd now?